Entitlement

I am currently in the process of planning a wedding (thank goodness it will be over soon!) As such, I participate on several forums having to do with wedding planning. It occurs to me as a result of my involvement and reading some of the posts that have been made there, that a great number of people carry around a sense of entitlement... that they are OWED certain things merely because they grace us with the pleasure of their existence. One post was made by someone who stated that she and her fiance can't afford groceries and barely can afford rent. Neither of them is currently employed. One of her parents, who is apparently experiencing financial struggles of their own, is footing the bill for a "very minimal, scaled-down" $7000 wedding. Now she wants advice on how to ask him to foot the bill for a honeymoon too, since she "desperately needs" one.

This makes my head spin. What happened to working hard to have nice things? Maybe it's because FH and I both worked in the family business when we were young, worked through college, and while we have both had help from our families at times, we don't expect it. We're adults. That means we have responsibilities. We both have families that WANT to contribute to our wedding financially. However, we see it as our responsibility to ensure that we are doing things as reasonably as possible. We have a florist who is charging us only for materials, nothing for labor, and is loaning us a lot of things. We found the least expensive caterer we could. My mom, sister, maid of honor, and I are making the favors ourselves. I am not entitled to having any of these things. I have family who wants to contribute, FH and I both work so that we can contribute. Wedding is being held at someone's home (the yard is gorgeous). We don't DESERVE even that much. Quite frankly, if we were not lucky enough to both be employed (especially given that Michigan's economy is complete GARBAGE right now), sure, we could still get married. But you know what? We could save several thousand dollars by simply going to the courthouse and having a JOP ceremony. We're not entitled to an event. Then, someone else stated that she didn't understand how ANYONE could have a wedding for less than $20,000. You know what? FH and I are doing it, and we don't feel the least bit deprived. In fact, we feel BLESSED (not in a religious sense) to have what we do.

I see a lot of this in the bridal shop I work at. "I want my dress steamed, and I need it back in 5 days because I'm jamming it in my suitcase/carryon/the overhead compartment for my destination wedding." Umm... you're better off having it pressed when you arrive. "But I'm entitled to a free steaming because I purchased it here." Okay, I'll press your dress, but that doesn't make you any less of a moron.

What is it that makes people feel like they are OWED certain things? Or that when things are available, are out there, people NEED to get them? I know this whole silly rant revolved around the wedding industry, and I'd love to expand further (I have lots more thoughts), but I have a meeting in about 10 minutes. Otherwise I'd probably discuss the NEED to have this season's clothing in one's closet before the start of the school year, rather than needing to have clothing that fits and is appropriate to the climate.